Friday, June 7, 2013


I'm sick and tired of hard lessons.  I don't want anymore hard lessons for myself or anyone I care about.  I also want to win the lottery... I don't know why I didn't win that 400 million a few weeks ago, I just don't get it.  Decisions decisions decisions, that's all life is...I don't mind it unless I make the wrong decision and then it's just not okay!  enough already!  I would like to have one week where I don't have to think about what to do, when to do it, if it's the right thing to do, who I'm going to do it with, and if doing it will screw up the future for me or someone else.  It's like playing Russian roulette on a daily basis...stop the madness.  Who am I kidding?  That's the reason we are here.  Making decisions and learning lessons, hard or otherwise.  That's the point and that's how it's going to be until we are done with this life.  It's HOW we live that matters.  I don't know how some people are able to sleep at night but I guess without them, the rest of us wouldn't be learning the hard lessons.  I'm making sense to myself, I'm sorry if I'm not making sense to you:)
My friend posted on Facebook "you will never get what you truly deserve if you remain attached to what you're supposed to let go of" stuck with me.  What do I truly deserve?  I know what I hope I deserve but does that mean it's in my future?  I know I need to let go of fear, that's my big obstacle right now.  I'm afraid of making the wrong decision for my future and the future of my family.  It's a big load to carry around every minute of every day and I need to let it go and trust that God will guide me.  No more lessons for me right now, okay God?  I need a respite, I'm asking on paper (virtual paper still counts) so it's down for the world to see...

Isaiah 41:10  Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your god.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand

1 comment:

  1. I'm going to add a scripture from Proverbs that I love.
    Provers 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and he will make your paths straight."


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