Friday, June 10, 2016

Sometimes it's easy...

Sometimes it's easy to forget because we don't want to remember.  Sometimes we forget because it's been so long.  But the thing we have to try to remember is that not everything we thought was terrible, the stuff we thought we'd never survive, was for naught.  Every experience shapes us, every experience teaches us and every experience, no matter how much we want to forget, is part of us.

I was driving through my old neighborhood this morning and it's funny how the site of a person's backyard fence brings back memories from 10 years ago...the year my kids were young and walking the dog around the block.  The fence my daughter crashed the scooter into and banged up her knee...the mind is a powerful thing.  Don't be fooled by it, don't think it will let you forget.  It won't.  Time is like a veil pulled down over memories, it can be your friend if you are trying to forget.  But time does not heal all wounds, it just dulls the pain.  Don't be afraid to face your fears, don't be afraid to remember the hard times. They make you stronger.

I tell my kids all the time to be their own person, don't be what someone else wants you to be.  As parents it can be hard to listen to that advice because we want so much for our kids that we tend to try and control everything and "steer" our children in the right direction...at least what we think is the right direction.  And the sad truth is that you can't continue to do that and expect your kids to grow up and be free thinkers and independent people.  Young people want to please their parents.  Make it easy on them by letting them know that you love them no matter what choices they make whether you agree with them or not.  Allow them to make their own mistakes and let them know you are there for them if they need you.  Threats and ultimatums might work when they are 5 or 6 but when they are 17, 18...21? no.  Sometimes it's easy to forget they have grown up...it's always hard to let them go.

Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Life keeps happening

We are mortal but our souls are not.  What we see is not always what we get.  What we see is a physical form that is fragile.  Who we are is what's inside the physical body...our soul.  The soul is infinite and cannot die.  Love comes from the soul.  Life is a journey.  Each journey has a beginning and an end.  Some are easier than others, some are longer than others but when our journey is over we are reunited in a place of peace and tranquility where time is not measured.  Until then, we are to learn and experience so that we grow to be better people.  As mere mortals we do not understand why we must suffer. I do not understand why terrible things happen.  I do not understand why we make mistakes that make us suffer.  I don't understand why life changes in an instant as we are helpless witnesses to it.  Without hardship, there is no growth.   That I do know.  Sometimes I think I won't make it but I do and somehow I've grown from it.  It's not easy, it's painful and heart breaking at times.  But when you've loved and experienced unconditional love you cannot be broken.
I have a very heavy heart today as I write this post because a young woman I knew, and had the pleasure of spending time with, has gone from this life.  Her journey here has ended and we have to stay the course without her.  Many lives have been touched by her life and will continue to be.  As we suffer her loss, we remember her and we should keep site of the fact that we will see her again when our journey's are over.

This post is for Ciara Ragan whom I knew for a short time and am thankful that I did.  She had a huge personality and was loved by many.  Her spunk and love for life were obvious in everything she did.  I know that she is at peace and in a better place but that does not change the fact that I will miss her as I travel the rest of my journey.